500 Days of Summer: Oh, Zooey D!

It's awful hard for me to dislike a character played by indie quirk queen Zooey Deschanel. Like a softer and saner Fairuza Balk, Deschanel always lends an intriguing presence as the (more often than not) object of affection, which people either like or hate. Though her best mainstream effort, in my opinion, was 2003's Elf (leading roles in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, 2005, The Happening, 2008, or Yes Man, 2008 all failed to do anything for her) she's best utilized in roles like The Good Girl (2002), All the Real Girls (2003), and she's certainly the most redeeming quality of quirky nonsense like Gigantic (2008).

So needless to say, I was surprised when I found myself cursing the existence of Deschanel's character, Summer Finn, when I recently caught music video director Marc Webb's feature film debut, (500) Days of Summer. A film documenting the ups and downs of a relationship that never quite gets off the ground, the film recounts through the eyes of its protagonist, Tom Hansen, (an excellent Joseph Gordon-Levitt, his best performance since Mysterious Skin, 2004---though I am a bit irritated to see he is in the new G.I. Joe bullshit movie starring Channing "Automaton" Tatum) a back and forth explanation of what and why things didn't work between himself and a young woman he was foolish enough to fall in love with. Having a degree in architecture, Tom never quite utilized his potential, working in a dead end job for a greeting card company. When Summer Finn begins as a new assistant for his boss, Tom is immediately taken by her beauty and unique demeanor. Summer, finding Tom interesting, initiates a relationship, though warning him several times along the way that she isn't looking for anything serious. As you can imagine, Tom doesn't take heed of her warnings and lets his heart get pulverized through the proverbial meat grinder. What sounds like a typical or formulaic film turns out to be a whimsical and astoundingly melancholic film. Gordon-Levitt isn't made out to be a fool--he's got plenty of reasons to believe feelings could be mutual at first. But when all the warning signs develop of Summer distancing herself from him, one can't help but feel his anguish and judge Ms. Deschanel's character for passively leading him on. An utter act of cruelty has Deschanel inviting him to a party after they had stopped contact for some time, only to have Tom discover at her party that she's become engaged to someone in the interim. What seems to be an exercise in the foolish masochism of the romantically inclined (the interpretation of the several references of The Graduate, 1967, are a gorgeous touch) ends up ending on at least a lighter note. In a world rife with undeserving assholes, it's difficult watching a genuinely decent guy getting kicked to the curb (even if this is a heterosexually oriented film). (500) Days of Summer is definitely a film that belongs and owes much of its likeability to Joseph Gordon-Levitt. Ms. Deschanel, unfortunately, is playing a character that may be understandable, but is hard to like (even though many of us should be lucky enough to relate to both of them). However, kudos to Webb for giving us a Deschanel that's a bit more dynamic than the average indie quirky girl she's usually cast as. One excellent, umm, post-coital scene, has Gordon-Levitt dancing around on the streets in a musical number, a scene compared to something out of Fellini, a nice moment in a film that plays like a melancholy poem about the devastation of unrequited love. A bittersweet little film that runs through a gamut of emotions, (500) Days of Summer is one of the more realistic films I've seen dealing with love and how we may or may not find it. It's not the feel good movie of the summer, but it maintains a feeling of hope while not insulting your intelligence---and that's a lot to ask from a film, let alone life.

Out of the Past: The Week in Film

Cinema Cess Pool Selection:
NA

The Banal, The Blah, The Banausic:
1. Spring Breakdown (2009) Dir. Ryan Shiraki - US
2. The Strange Door (1951) Dir. Joseph Pevney - US
3. The Gay Deceivers (1969) Dir. Bruce Kessler - US
4. It! (1966) Dir. Herbert J. Leder - UK
5. Horseman (2009) Dir. Jonas Akerlund - US

Astounding Cinema:
1. Beloved (1998) Dir. Jonathan Demme - US

Theatrical Releases:
1. Humpday (2009) Dir. Lynn Shelton - US 9/10
2. The Hurt Locker (2009) Dir. Kathryn Bigelow - US 9/10

It was a strange week of cinema, not a whole lot of good films and nothing fantastically awful, but a whole lot in-between.

I had been curious to see Ryan Shiraki's Spring Breakdown for some time now, a self described "gay acid trip," though I'm not certain how the director found his film to be a gay acid trip unless he was on one himself during filming. The real reason I wanted to see (and own) the film was for my gal Parker Posey. Not to mention the combined talents of Posey, Amy Poehler, Jane Lynch, and Missi Pyle --- some of the funniest women in comedy films. The plot of Breakdown centers around a group of awkward young college girls who became awkward young women (Posey, Poehler and Rachel Dratch) and who decide to go on a spring break vacation well into their thirties, the type they always missed out on when it was an appropriate time for vacation. However, as Posey works for a senator about to be picked as a vice presidential running mate (Lynch), Posey is forced to tail it to Mexico to look after Lynch's daughter during spring break. Posey's friends tag along and multiple scenarios occur, most of them entertaining or funny. Poehler gets the brightest comic moments while the strange looking Dratch gets to horse it up with her extremely annoying fiance, a very gay closeted man that likes to shorten all of his words. Sadly, Posey is the straight man and doesn't get too many opportunities to do much of anything in Spring Breakdown, a film that doesn't seem to utilize any of these actresses' talent, but whose presence elevates this film into more than it should be. I'm not surprised this film went straight to DVD, but I'd love to see these funny ladies together in something actually funny. I'm most bummed because Parker Posey had two of the best roles in two of my top 2007 releases, Fay Grim and Broken English. 2008 saw her in five seconds of the awful Jessica Alba remake The Eye, a failed television series (Parker Posey is too good for TV, by the friggin way) and then of course the straight to DVD release of this film. Posey fans will have to rejoice at her next release, Happy Tears (2010), where she will be starring as Demi Moore's sister. Overall, Spring Breakdown is worth the price of a rental, but it's a crime to not be a better film with this much talent involved. It's a gay acid nightmare. All my favorite actresses appearing in a mediocre film.

Oh, I wanted to like The Strange Door more than I did, as well. Charles Laughton stars in all his sallow, sweaty glory in hack director Joseph Pevney's adaptation of a Robert Louis Stevenson story, along with Boris Karloff in a minor, minor role as, ahem, Voltan, the butler who knows a secret. Well, there isn't much of one. Laughton loved this woman (well, in a fag-hag sort of sense, you see---oh, that's reality creeping in, sorry, check) who screwed him over and married his brother, who she managed to propagate the species with, ya know what I mean? It's unclear what happened to her, but after giving birth, she died and Laughton locked up his brother in a dungeon cell and raised his niece to the age of twenty with the devious intentions of forcing her to marry a man known to have a disreputable reputation as a scallywag criminal. Yes. That is actually his plot of revenge. I haven't read the Stevenson story, so I can't tell if this, ummm, slight and quite unbelievable revenge plot wasn't a bit psychosexually neutered by our lovely censorship code at the time. Keep in mind, this is also set in France. Richard Wyler stars as said scallywag, who becomes imprisoned after fleeing a bar brawl into the woods, stumbling upon the titular door and placing himself in the spider's web. The plot slowly unravels, the entertaining Laughton shaking his sweaty jowls this way and that. His niece, Blanche, believes her father is dead, though he's locked up beneath her feet. The film further aligns itself with all things dull and ridiculous when, after being introduced and apparently bonding over escape attempts, Blanche and her arranged suitor fall in love. I don't know why--he's dirty and sweaty while she looks pale and bored, but if it smells like a horse and it sounds like a horse, you know....Oh yeah, Karloff is in charge of watering Laughton's brother in the basement, and he is the only one that knows the brother isn't crazy and only pretends to be so Laughton won't kill him. Righto.

Now, I know I am not the only queer theorist that would like to recuperate some of the lambasted films from the first wave of queer theorism (e.g. Good vs. Bad queer images), but Vito Russo was correct in his derision of the 1969 film, The Gay Deceivers. I think I was confusing this film with the British film The Naked Civil Servant (1975), so when I sat down to watch it I was a bit confused and then dismayed at the stale, homophobic elements of the film. The film tells the story of Danny and Elliott, two straight dudes that just want to avoid the draft, and so pretend to be homosexuals. However, the ruse becomes two much for them to handle. Of course it would be when you have to keep reinforcing your dislike and hatred for the thing you're trying to pretend to be. The film pretty much reinforces how awful it is even pretending to be gay, much less the ridiculous stereotypical queens the film denigrates throughout. Yes, Michael Greer, one of the first out Hollywood actors stars in the film and much has been said about the fact that he rewrote his character in an attempt to make him less stereotypical and less the butt of all jokes. Well, okay. The film is still homophobic. Sadly, if it were to be remade by a major studio today, many of the attitudes would remain the same. Oh yeah, we had Chuck and Larry recently. Maybe it's time I lampooned that film. If you're looking for a progressive slice of 60's nostalgia, avoid The Gay Deceivers. Yes, it's one of the first movies where the actual gay men aren't self loathing and suicidal. That's not progressive, just happenstance. Who is credited with discovering the Pacific Ocean? Balboa? Because none of woman borne saw it first, right?

Somewhere between Clara Bow and Stephen King we had the 1966 UK horror film It! starring Roddy McDowell. Whereas other "it" films refer directly to something that just doesn't have better moniker, the "it" in Roddy's movie is actually a golem. So I don't know why the film wasn't titled The Golem! I realize there's a silent German classic of the same name, but It! is already dealing narratively with the same subject matter. And why the explanation mark, I will never know. No one shouts the word it, golem, or much of anything else. McDowell stars as an assistant museum curator and things get wonky when the museum's warehouse burns down, leaving the rock solid golem statue. The golem kills the curator and eventually becomes the minion of the nefarious McDowell. Except McDowell is just a closet case mama's boy (he has mother's corpse sitting in his living room, so you know all wasn't right in Roddy land before the appearance of an old Jewish curse-monster) so he has the golem kill new curators and tear down bridges so he can feel big and strong. Yawn yawn yawn. It took me three sittings to get through this one and I wasn't thrilled or excited at all. Oh, Roddy. It! is not a good movie.

Well, if anything came close to being a cess pool cinema contender this week, it was the new Dennis Quaid thriller, Horseman (2009). Prey to the flashy trend of religious/biblical gimmicks and sort of exploit them into trashy, serial killer narratives. Several victims are found suspended in the air by the flesh on their backs (kind of like what Vincent D'onofrio does to relax in The Cell, 2000) and the written words "come and see" all over several crime scenes. Well, it takes Quaid's seven year old to give him the idea to actually look up what the phrase might mean in a book of phrases. I started using google or wikipedia long ago, but maybe I'm a tad younger and less religious than the screenwriter. "Come and see" is from Revelations and it's not long before Quaid explains the very vague four horseman theme that ties this film together like Helen Keller doing French braids. There's actually more than four and they're all children that are essentially punishing their parents for being abusive or neglectful of their needs. Patrick Fugit (Almost Famous, 1999) is daringly cast as a OMG! gay boy shunned by his parents and brother, who meets him in a coffee shop to cantankerously exclaim how embarrassing it is to walk down the street and have everyone know that your own "blood" is a faggot. Is this 1982? Are they living in Saspirilla, Mississippi? No and no. Fugit, reduced to tears, is one of the horseman. Drugging his brother's coffee, he suspends his brother via meathook and forces him to watch him saw out his insides while he's all hopped on on PCP. Needless to say, this doesn't cure the brother from hating gays, though the film results in making me dislike almost everybody. But when the screenwriter is Dave Callahan who previously wrote Doom (2005) and this is the debut of a music video director from Sweden, maybe you can understand how this travesty came into being. Overall, completely forgettable.

This film's top DVD pick goes to Jonathan Demme's adaptation of Toni Morrison's novel, Beloved. A film that certainly deserves more discussion (and some recuperation) due to it's panned release in 1998, cannot be given due credit here. However, there's so much going on within this film's narrative, it's impossible not to like. While I found it much easier to sit through than The Color Purple (1985), Beloved is still a heavy film, dealing with the death of children, the end of slavery (though of course, the beginning of a new era of prejudice and bigotry) and a supernatural presence, it also sports an awesome performance from Oprah Winfrey. The most uncomfortable and daring feature of the film, however, is the eponymous Beloved, played by Thandie Newton. Newton is playing a character that is, in essence, an apparition that emerges from the swamplands, at once organic and supernatural. Behaving like a handicapped child, she not only upsets the downtrodden lives of Sethe and her daughter Denver (Winfrey and an excellent Kimberly Elise) but also the narrative itself. In discussing this with guests that came to see Beloved for a movie night, most people seemed to have a negative reaction to Newton's performance. However, Newton was starring as a character that simply couldn't be scripted as there's no cinematic precedence for a character such as hers. Though she might take one out of the narrative (and more so on screen than in the novel) I believe this has more to do with audiences' discomfort at watching handicapped characterizations. Since Newton is not really playing a handicapped human, I believe her performance is open to all sorts of criticism that other actors in other films are not. I found Newton fascinating, from the moment she appears out of the swamps and positions herself outside of Winfrey's house-- she stumbles around, much like a newborn animal not yet used to a body, her voice is frog-like and gravelly, her understanding of the world is childlike yet responsive. And when you realize what's inside her and how it came to be there, you'll hopefully realize how powerful this film really is. While nothing has a clear or clean explanation, this only adds to the film's powerful sadness. Not really about redemption, not really a ghost story, Beloved is about things that haunt us---things that will never be laid to rest, never be forgotten. And I mean historically as well. Danny Glover is a calming presence, but he is given little to do, especially in comparison to three powerful performances from Winfrey, Newton and Elise. Writing about Beloved makes me want to watch it again---there's a lot going on with sexuality, madness, guilt, etc. I loved it, and especially because it's the kind of film that sparks endless discussion.

Out of the Past: The Week in Film

Cinema Cess Pool Selection:
NA

The Banal, The Blah, The Banausic:
1. The Climax (1944) Dir. George Waggner – US
2. Tokyo Gore Police (2008) Dir. Yoshihiro Nishimura – Japan
3. Special (2006) Dir. Hal Haberman & Jeremy Passmore – US

Astounding Cinema:
4. Sullivan’s Travels (1941) Dir. Preston Sturges – US
3. White Zombie (1932) Dir. Victor Halperin – US
2. The Big Knife (1955) Dir. Robert Aldrich – US
1. Harold & Maude (1971) Dir. Hal Ashby – US

Rewatched:
1. From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) Dir. Robert Rodriguez – US

Theatrical Releases
3. Bruno (2009) Dir. Larry Charles – US 9/10
2. Cheri (2009) Dir. Stephen Frears – UK 9/10
1. Jerichow (2008) Dir. Christian Petzold – Germany 9/10

Sadly, I have no miserable pieces of shit cinema to bitch about this week. However, all three of my mediocre selections happened to have some redeeming qualities. This week's worst of the bunch, the 1944 "horror thriller" The Climax is one of those ironically named films because it doesn't ever reach its eponymous promise. Starring Boris Karloff as a doctor obsessed with a famous opera singer, he kills his love as she doesn't want to be a housewife. Skip ahead ten years, and a young ingenue discovered by the dead opera singer's agent sounds nearly exactly like the dead singer. Karloff, not only a physician but also an avid opera attendee, it seems, hears her practicing and hatches a plot to kill her so as to silence her similar voice. As you can see, The Climax is a bit anticlimactic, relying on WAY TOO MANY dubbed opera scenes to flesh out the film that lacks in plot. Karloff, always game to play bad nasties, is good, but he's given too little screen time to really care about him. Gale Sondergaard is also given a thankless role, though her presence does perk interest during an extremely lacking second half. The main problem is the nondescript heroine, played by the dull and uncharismatic Susannah Foster. Though beautifully shot in technicolor, it's no surprise that the film's director was reduced to directing television.

Another gory (a euphemism believe me) wacky J-horror/thriller with some strong imagery that failed to spark my interest was Tokyo Gore Police (2008). Director Yoshihiro Nishiumura's first film to cross overseas (he's well known as a make up artist) has quickly established himself as part of a new generation of genre filmmakers from Japan with this strange little number and his latest film, Vampire Girl Vs. Frankenstein Girl (2009). Some strong images in the film, such as a living body turned into a breathing chair that pees all over a strange party, along with various appendages being chewed or ripped off, and a woman with forearms or legs hobbling around using knives as a quadruped are just a few, however, the plot failed to catch me. Supposedly this film is a social commentary, and though it does focus on the privatization of police and our heroine Ruka, who is trying to avenge her father's assassination, the plot develops into such a kittywampus mess that I could care less about Ruka, her mission, or the privatization of the police. It looks nice (and bloody disgusting) but it needed more cohesion. It reminded me off one of Takashi Miike's misfires.

And sadly, Special (2006) failed to make my best of list by a nose. Michael Rapaport stars as a lonely meter maid who enrolls as a test patient for an experimental new anti-depressant, one that's supposed to make you feel special. However, Rapaport believes he has developed super powers due to the medication and begins to compromise the drug makers. What is really an ingenious idea for a film is hampered by small budget. The creators of the drug, two seedy businessman brothers, go after the simple minded Rapaport in order to get him off their drug, which eventually nearly ends up in murder. It is here where the film is its most unbelievable---many more people would be involved in a test case scenario concerning a new anti-depressant. Rapaport, on the other hand, is wonderful as the lonely and confused Les, who just wants to feel needed and special (especially from an actor who specializes in playing simpletons, both good and bad). The film lacks credibility, but it's definitely worth some attention, and I would look forward to more from directors Hal Haberman & Jeremy Passmore.

As for this week's top picks, at the number four slot is a film I had thought I would like a lot more than I really did, Preston Sturges' Sullivan's Travels (1941). The quintessential film about the making of a film (and also where the Coen Bros. got their title for O Brother Where Art Thou?, 2000) the film stars an enigmatic Joel McCrea and the always lovely Veronica Lake. McCrea stars as film director John Sullivan who goes on the road as a hobo to learn what it is to suffer in order to direct his next film, an adaption of a novel called O Brother Where Art Thou. On the way he runs into Veronica Lake, a woman on her way out of Hollywood after attempting to make her way in the movie industry. Our two leads fall in love and then McCrea is accidentally imprisoned for the deserved beating of a nasty railroad worker. The moral of the story is McCrea doesn't want to make a story about suffering--he'd rather make the world laugh. Well that's nice. Preston Sturges, a man whose work I generally love, has directed a well meaning and well made film with Sullivan's Travels---however, I think that its reputation precedes it.

Bela Lugosi, typecast after Dracula (1931) starred as an equally evil man in 1932's White Zombie, the best known film from director Victor Halperin (who also directed Supernatural, 1933, with Carole Lombard). Set in 1930's Haiti (which had yet to be liberated from US occupation, though this is conveniently ignored in the film) was filmed in 11 days on used sets from Dracula and Frankenstein and tells the story of a man that turns to a witch doctor, (Lugosi) to capture the love of a woman and lure her away from her fiance. However, the witch doctor turns her into a zombie slave, much like he has to all the Haitians he has running his mill. Though short of anything new or shocking, the film is full of atmosphere, with its foggy locations and gothic mansion, the film is a quick little genre jaunt and well worth the watch.

For a review of The Big Knife (1955) please click here to read this week's Past Cinema Regression.

And the number one film this week is Hal Ashby's 1971 cult classic, Harold & Maude, which it is embarrassing to admit that I have only seen just this week. I loved it, and mostly for the excellent Ruth Gordon, but also for a lovely but awkward Bud Cort and mood setting soundtrack by Cat Stevens. A fascinating ode to love, the film, as you may be aware is about a depressed young man, Harold, who develops a relationship with Maude, a soon-to-be octogenarian. The two meet while attending random funerals and develop an interesting dynamic, kind of becoming lovers, but what's really going on is Maude showing Harold how to fall in love with life. He's barely begun his and she's at the end of hers. Listening to Devotchka's amazing "How It Ends" as I write this, I'm getting all emotional thinking about Harold & Maude, a film that will certainly leave an impression on you. Definitely my favorite Hal Ashby film, the great American director, neglected and unrecognized to this day, but responsible for The Last Detail (1973), Shampoo (1975), Coming Home (1978) and Being There (1979). That said, please visit this link, which details a recent A.M.P.A.S to Harold & Maude---a film that I urge any of you that haven't seen it to please go out and do so. If I had to make a short list of films whose titles I could shout off the rooftops to get people to see them, Harold & Maude would be among those titles.

Cheri: La Liason Du Cougar

Renewing my mission to finally sit down and watch Dangerous Liaisons (1988), the previous union of director Stephen Frears, screenwriter Christopher Hampton and movie star Michelle Pfeiffer, I enjoyed the rather melancholy adaptation of two of Colette's novels, Cheri---which aptly portrays love as something beyond passion, and age as an ever inalienable aspect of who we choose to love and when we choose them. I've no idea why I've yet to see Frears' Dangerous Liaisons---like any young gay cinephiles obsessed with actresses I had my Glenn Close stage as a young teenager. Perhaps it was the level of difficulty I'd met before finally being able to sneak watch Fatal Attraction (1987), or maybe I'd moved on to Faye Dunaway by then....regardless, I've yet to see cinema's renowned adaptation of the French novel of sexual politics and evil mind games, even though there are actual French film versions starring Jeanne Moreau (1959) and Catherine Deneuve (2003)---plus an ill timed adaptation by Milos Forman, Valmont (1989) and the new generation's modernization of the tale, Cruel Intentions (1999).

The material, then, for Cheri (meaning "darling" in the masculine sense) is, no doubt, much less volatile, but nevertheless intriguing. Set during the decadent Belle Epoque period in France, I would like to note that Frears and Pfeiffer make it all a little too English---I believe a French version would be more lusty, passionate, and sexual. We are, after all, dealing with, as the narrator informs, a time when these particular courtesans were quite wealthy and had some degree of social power---even though they were prostitutes. I may have preferred a Gallic adaptation with Isabelle Huppert, though I'm certain that would have been a bit more psychosexual (and we already have Ma Mere, 2004). As for an English/Hollywood adaptation, I truly believe Michelle Pfeiffer is currently the most appropriate selection for this role. In the 1990's, Jessica Lange was attached to star, but alas, was considered too old once the project came together. Pfeiffer is indeed radiant as Lea de Lonval, a courtesan considering retirement, about to enter her ravishing 50's. Kathy Bates stars as a, umm, old co-worker Mme. Peloux, whose son, the wayward Cheri, is squandering his youth on drugs and prostitutes. Bates seeks out Pfeiffer's help to, well, make a man out of the scallywag---but instead they fall in love. Spending six years together, the film jumps over the couple's bonding to focus on the intervention of Bates, who arranges a marriage for Cheri. The rest of the film focuses on Pfeiffer and Rupert Friend (Cheri) as they come to realize, at different times, that what they had together they would never find again. Pfeiffer's last speech to Friend is quite enthralling and moving. The film's only problem is we come only to care for Pfeiffer, and sometimes wonder why the hell she fell in love with Cheri. The film lacks passion and chemistry, but because of it, creates an interesting angle about the machinations of love. Overall, the film is also an ode to the beauty of Michelle Pfeiffer, who now in her 50's, is more gorgeous than ever. I predict an Oscar nod to Pfeiffer, and perhaps more of her films won't go straight to DVD like Personal Effects (2009) and I Could Never Be Your Woman (2007). Bates' Mme. Peloux seems to border on caricature, but given her amount of screen time and jovial manipulativeness, I found her to be fitting as an ill preserved courtesan. A laudable effort for the ever competent Frears.

Bestill My Big Gay Heart: Sigourney & the Emmy

As an avid Sigourney Weaver aficionado, I would like to do my part announcing that darling Siggy was nominated for an Emmy for Best Actress (in a made for television film) due to her excellent turn as a homophobic mom turned gay rights activist in Prayers For Bobby (2009). I am not a fan of television, and hence, rarely follow the Emmys, but I do happen to see that another favorite of mine is up against Siggy, Jessica Lange for Grey Gardens (2009). I hope I don't have to begin resenting Jessica as I truly hope Sigourney Weaver wins for her film, which pertains to a painfully realistic problem in our country.

Jerichow: The Postman Might Ring Four (or Five) Times

I don’t know what it is about mystery writer James M. Cain’s The Postman Always Rings Twice that makes it so worthy of so many adaptations. Perhaps it’s the innuendo laden title, viciously poetic, that catches our eyes and imaginations. Cain was responsible for writing the novels in which three of the best damn 1940’s film noirs were based on: Michael Curtiz’s Mildred Pierce (1945); Billy Wilder’s Double Indemnity (1944), and of course, The Postman Always Rings Twice (1946), directed by the relatively unknown Tay Garnett. Perhaps it’s auteur theory at work---Curtiz and Wilders were masters of the silver screen, and to rehash what’s already considered perfect can be taboo. Maybe it’s the fact that Postman was first filmed by Italian maestro, Luchino Visconti as Ossessione (1943).

Concerning a married woman in an un-pleasant marriage who falls in love with a dodgy drifter, while they pair up to murder her floppy husband, the original US version stars Lana Turner and John Garfield as the passionate infidels. Turner famously wears only white, meant as a stark contrast to her murderous intentions. Due to the bloody Hays code, adapting Cain’s highly sexualized material into a tame film delayed the adapting of the novel (which apparently took 12 years on US soil). The film is often noted for the sweltering sexual tension between Turner and Garfield, with Turner especially oozing sensuality, and was famously remade by Bob Rafelson in 1981 with Jessica Lange and Jack Nicholson, respectively. As you can imagine, the sex sequences are much more intense, including a now infamous kitchen sink scene. Depending on your preference, the resulting sexiness of the two films is up for debate. Nevertheless, the 1981 film shot Jessica Lange into super stardom in the 1980’s, her career finally recovering from the reaction critics had to the film in which she made her debut, the first King Kong (1976) remake.

And now the Germans have their say. Christian Petzold, director of the gorgeous and intriguing thriller Yella (2007) returns with Jerichow (2008), a sort of re-vamp of Postman, named after a poor economic region of East Germany. Petzold (let’s keep our fingers crossed) could be the second coming of Fassbinder, complete with muse in tow, as German beauty Nina Hoss scores the lead in a great deal of his work. Known for slowly building foreboding into a crescendo of tension, Petzold’s work should appeal to anyone enjoying Michael Haneke (though Petzold’s work may be a bit more accessible). In both Yella and Jerichow he takes the devastatingly gorgeous Hoss and crafts her into different facets of desperation, a victim of her surroundings and her gender. Petzold has modernized the story effectively with the femme fatale Postman role. The most unbelievable parts of both US films were Turner/Lange’s relationship to their married husbands (Cecil Kellaway and John Colicos)---and their subsequent attractions to male drifters John Garfield and Jack Nicholson. Now, I don’t know about you, but Nicholson especially was never close to being magnetically scintillating in any kind of sexual sense, even in his younger old days in the 70’s and 80’s (like Cher, Michelle Pfeiffer, and Susan Sarandon swooning over him in The Witches of Eastwick, 1988—yeah, right). I never found Garfield to be charismatic, either (much the same way I felt Robert Mitchum was as a male lead---icky). Petzold casts Benno Furmann, a very Aryan/Nordic, well-built actor, who portrays the drifter as rather intelligent and with dark secrets of his own (such as being dishonorably discharged from the military while serving in Afghanistan). Hilmi Sozer stars as the husband, played sympathetically by the dumpy but not horrifically unattractive actor that Ebert compared to a Greek looking Bob Hoskins. The reason he snagged a looker like Hoss as a wife was because he paid off her incredible amount of debt (something she accumulated after a mysterious stint in prison) and a prenuptial agreement states that if she were to leave her husband, she would inherit back her debt. Ere goes, the solution is murder. Hoss portrays her character, Laura, manipulatively. It’s easy to see she’s sexually attracted to Furmann, but after sleeping together, he says he’s in love, while she tells him there’s only one way to break the tie that binds. Whereas the other Postman treatments delve into the aftermath of murder, Jerichow leaves the beaten path, intriguingly twisting the plot and invariably expanding the depth of the characters. None of them are particularly good people, but neither are they particularly bad---they all have feelings. Petzold is a force to watch out for, and while I still prefer Yella, his new film is an excellent force to seek out, expanding on foreboding and paranoia in isolated pockets of East Germany, with beautiful, desperate women and abusive men amidst the backdrop of gorgeous cinematography in the countryside.

Sunday, July 19, 2009 -- Jonathan Demme's "Beloved" (1998)

Please join me for July’s movie night screening of Jonathan Demme’s infamously received adaptation of Toni Morrison’s Beloved (1998). Starring Oprah Winfrey, Danny Glover, Thandie Newton (in her breakout performance), Kimberly Elise, and Lisa Gay Hamilton, I am proud to announce that I will be serving Patti LaBelle’s highly caloric Macaroni & Cheese as comfort food to assuage the trauma. Kleenex will be provided as well.

Oprah Winfrey made a commendable effort to get Morrison’s novel on the big screen, (in a long tradition of the tortuous efforts of females attempting to get compelling stories about women on the screen, i.e., Winona Ryder and Girl Interrupted, 1999) having purchased the rights to the novel in 1987. Oprah also went through a 24 hour simulation of the “slavery” experience, which included being blindfolded and left alone in the woods. Alas, those in charge did not supply us with this footage as a DVD extra. Eerily enough (perhaps more so after you see the film), Thandie Newton’s first name, which is of African origin, means “beloved.”

On a very personal note, I wish to inform you that this will be the last movie night in which Joseph, my boyfriend, will be able to attend. The film selection for this event is dedicated to him. He will be gone until November, as he will be beginning medical school. Please be sure to congratulate Joseph and be extra nice to me. Joseph should be back in Minneapolis for about a month in December, so I’ll hope to throw one more big movie night that month.

I am also happy to announce that Joseph and I recently became registered domestic partners, which, on paper, may seem ridiculously simple, but to me, succinctly states that I’ve found someone to share my life with. However, as a lover of words, I don’t believe I can find the right ones to describe how happy I am to be with Joseph and how much it means to me that we’re able to at least have some public recognition. So, without further ado, I invite you all to a 6:00 PM screening of Beloved, which, if we begin more or less on time, should end by about 9:00 PM.

Out of the Past: The Week in Film

Cinema Cess Pool Selections:

1. Shocker (1989) Dir. Wes Craven - US

2. Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus (2009) Dir. Jack Perez - US

The Banal, the Blah, the Banausic:
1. Cruel Story of Youth (1960) Dir. Nagisa Oshima - Japan

2. The Crazies (1973) Dir. George A Romero - US

3. Europa Europa (1990) Dir. Agnieszka Holland - Germany

4. Eden Log (2007) Dir. Franck Vestiel - France

Rewatched Goodies:
1. Suddenly Last Summer (1959) Dir. Joseph L. Mankiewicz - US

Theatrical Releases:

1. Public Enemies (2009) Dir. Michael Mann - US 7/10

Astounding/Meritorious Cinema:

5. Horrors of Malformed Men (1969) Dir. Teruo Ishii - Japan

4. Whip & the Body (1963) Dir. Mario Bava - Italy

3. Harvey (1950) Dir. Henry Koster - US

2. The Spider Woman (1944) Dir. Roy William Neill - UK

1. What's the Matter With Helen (1971) Dir. Curtis Harrington - US (please read my Past Cinema Regression column)

Well my friends, I was bitchslapped with a vengeance this week, having seen two utterly, deplorably awful films that very nearly placed me in the throes of anaphylactic shock. Of course, I was prepared for the expected putridity of Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus (2009) starring Debbie Gibson (looking like the more fortunate--yet still in need of cosmetic assistance-- cousin of Sandra Bernhard) and D cinema and television staple, Lorenzo Lamas. Having seen better CGI effects in pornographic films, including better dialogue, this turkey doesn't even fit into the category of so bad it's good cinema---it's just fucking awful. But knowing that going in certainly helps. I love how the extras on the DVD sport Lamas talking about the misogynistic roots of his, ermm, character while also informing us of his death sequence---even though that ended up on the cutting room floor. One advantage of the snuff film is that you can only film one death sequence. Also, actor Vic Chao, starring as one of a numerous amount of Pan-Asians masquerading as Japanese people with better English speaking abilities than many white people, credits the director with casting an unusual love interest between a white woman and an Asian man. I hardly would credit Mega Shark Vs. Giant Octopus as a film breaking down any social barriers, however.

I was actually unprepared, on the other hand, about how certifiably fucking goddamn awful Wes Craven's 1989 trough Shocker was going to be. Starring that rodent actor Peter Berg (from "Chicago Hope," and The Great White Hype, 1996) whom my boyfriend decided looked a lot like the early 90's Juliette Lewis, Shocker was meant to be the beginning of a new franchise by Craven-apparently he was screwed over on some of The Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) profits. As a huge horror cinema fan, I must admit that I could never stand any of the Elm Street films---in fact, I don't even really like Wes Craven (with the exception of The People Under the Stairs, 1992, or maybe Red Eye, 2005). Needless to say, I'm far from disappointed to see his early 70's and 80's works being remade, as Craven is certainly a man of creepy and interesting concepts---he just doesn't execute them effectively. Shocker happens to also be an awful fucking concept, however. A serial killer put to death by the electric chair somehow manages to use electricity to come back from the dead and kill more people. It's up to Peter Berg (did you know, he directed Hancock, 2008?) the serial killer's biological son, to put a stop to it. Ghostly girlfriends, hammy Michael Moriarity, and an extremely over-the-top, embarrassing performance by Mitch Pileggi as the serial killer make this film shockingly bad and poorly conceived.

Working my way through the oeuvre of Japanese master Nagisa Oshima, I most certainly don't care for his earlier 1960's works, though Cruel Story of Youth (1960) isn't awful, it's just rather dull and meandering, which is sort of a rebellious youth story of 60's Japanese youths. The same goes for horror master George A. Romero's The Crazies (1973) which tries really hard to be a social commentary about using military force when an outbreak in a small town causes residents to go crazy and kill people. Again, Romero, like Craven, tries really hard, but I think he often misses his mark (why Diary of the Dead, 2007, received such high praise I will never know).

As for another entry in the burgeoning French Sci-Fi franchise, Eden Log suffers from a champagne taste on a beer budget. An excellent concept about a dark dystopia touching on energy resources and horrific immigration practices, Eden Log was shot on handheld cameras that make it hard to follow and hard to see, much like Marc Caro's solo debut, Dante 01 (2008). Eden Log is worth a look, and pays homage to several sci-fi genre greats, but make sure you're not sleepy.

I was disappointed in myself as I really wanted to like Europa Europa, the true story of a Jewish boy who survives WWII by posing as an Aryan youth. I quite liked the perverse Angry Harvest (1985), also from director Agnieszka Holland, and Europa Europa, while intriguingly touches upon a homosexual Nazi and a young, very Anti-Semitic Julie Delpy as a sex starved Nazi girl, I felt Europa Europa never quite elevated itself into a great film. As a youth that makes it into the Nazi party and attends Nazi school, the most compelling predicament is our main character, Solly, being forced to hide his circumcised penis. A compelling look at a survivor's story, the film ends rather abruptly and fails to add depth or substance to our main character, a handsome young man loved by all for his good looks---however, his looks make his characterization difficult.

Japanese cult director, Teruo Ishii's adaptation of an Edogawa Rampo story, Horrors of Malformed Men, most definitely wasn't what I expected, but it was strange and macabre, nonetheless. I had expected a Japanese treatment of The Island of Dr. Moreau, but instead it's a twisted and almost incomprehensible tale of familial dysfunction. At times a bit tedious, it's worth a look and seems to be one of the more accessible features from Ishii.

I've only ever seen one other Mario Bava picture, his most famous work, Black Sunday (1960) which made an international star out of scream queen Barbara Shelley (though I find her at her creepiest in Fellini's 8 1/2, 1963). But I made the mistake of watching too many giallos over a short period of time, and I now feel unable to sit through any more selections from the hokey genre. I think the dubbing gets to me. Anyhow, though Bava's Whip and the Body (1963) was actually filmed in English, it was still dubbed, which was a bit annoying, as British star Christopher Lee has a distinctive voice---but since he dies towards the beginning and haunts everyone through the rest of the film, his dialogue is thankfully minimal. A bit of a gothic ghost story romance, the most interesting aspect of Whip and the Body is the often unexplored sadomasochistic theme lining the film. Palestinian born foreign import Daliah Lavi stars as the woman that loves Lee....because he knows how to appease her abuse-lust via whipping. Never before have I seen such a beautiful woman swoon while being lacerated with a whip, which sets Bava's film intriguingly apart in its somewhat futile attempt at sexual exploration. Lavi was part of the group of foreign bombshells that never really took off in the US, though she appeared in the Bond spoof Casino Royale (1967).

A sentimental 1950's classic, Harvey (1950) stars Jimmy Stewart in Capraesque mode as a doofy simpleton having Harvey, an imaginary 6 foot 3 inch rabbit as a friend he drags everywhere. Stewart's schtick gets a little long in the tooth, but director Henry Koster's adaptation of the stage play is quite entertaining, with Josephine Hull as Stewart's well-meaning older sister lighting up the screen every minute she's on it (for which she won a Best Supporting Actress Oscar).

The intriguing screen presence Gale Sondergaard (who graduated from the U of M, and was born in Litchfield, Minnesota) stars in The Spider Woman, an entry in the Sherlock Holmes films series starring Basil Rathbone. I have a feeling that I would have murderous intentions for Nigel Bruce, who stars as Watson, the bumbling bloody fool of a sidekick for Holmes, if I were to watch more of these films, but thankfully he's granted only a handful of scenes. Sondergaard was renowned as a character actress known for portraying evil yet hauntingly beautiful women. It is said that Disney's creation of the Evil Queen in Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs was based on Sondergaard. She was also offered the part of the ugly Wicked Witch of the West in The Wizard Of Oz (1939), a role that eventually went to Margaret Hamilton. Sondergaard was a casualty of McCarthyism, and unfortunately wasn't on the screen in the 1950's, but she's deliciously, wickedly entertaining in The Spider Woman as a femme fatale using spider poison to off down and out gamblers. Sondergaard was the first recipient of the Best Supporting Actress statue for Anthony Adverse (1936), and I highly recommend her evil performance in the Bette Davis film, The Letter (1940).

Please click here to read my column Past Cinema Regression, concerning this week's top flic pick,
"What's The Matter With Helen?"

Public Enemies: The Jonas Bros. Story

Let's get one thing straight---actors were apparently clamoring to nab any role they could in Michael Mann's gangster drama Public Enemies. Reduced nearly to cameos, I spied Shawn Hatosy, Leelee Sobieski, Channing Tatum, Lili Taylor, Giovanni Ribisi, and Stephen Lang (gay cinema lovers should recognize Lang as the closet case husband of Jennifer Jason Leigh in Last Exit to Brooklyn - 1989). Not to mention the presence of Stephen Dorff and Billy Crudup in roles closer to cameo appearances rather than performances. In the end, I just kind of wondered why. Christian Bale is the angry Melvin Purvis and Johnny Depp is the bee-stung Dillinger, the nicest, it seems, of the bank robber baddies from the 1930's. And Marion Cotillard stars as Depp's love interest. A mostly unromanticized gangster epic, Mann's newest film is interesting, with some cool shots, and beautiful music, but it's a bit long in the tooth. There's nothing exactly wrong with it, but there's not a whole lot of excitement, either. Perhaps the failure is that Mann is recalling an infamous, oft-romanticized period of Americana history, but in an unsympathetic way. What happens when we don't root for the notorious bank robbers? Well, we realize they got what they deserved. Do I like seeing women get tossed around? No, quite the contrary. But how bad should I feel for Marion Cotillard's character when she gets manhandled by the police? They want information as to the whereabouts of a murderous bank robber and she's his girlfriend. It's the company you keep, my girl. Ah, those were the days, when banks could be robbed in under two minutes. I walked away from Public Enemies feeling underwhelmed but certain of one thing--while technology has advanced to a level of hyperintelligence (when it comes to robbing banks), the prejudice of people remains the same. Cotillard's character reluctantly reveals that she's half French and half Native American. "Most men don't like that part," she says. "I'm not most men," says Depp. Well, it's nice to know that bank robbers are more open minded than bankers. Public Enemies is a decent film, but I've yet to think Michael Mann will ever top The Last of the Mohicans (1992) or Heat (1995).

Out of the Past: The Week in Film

Cinema Cess Pool Selection:
NA

The Banal, The Blah, The Banausic:

1. Son of Dracula (1943) Dir. Robert Siodmak - US

2. Link (1986) Dir. Richard Franklin - UK

Astounding Cinema:

4. MST3K 3000: The She Creature (1956) Dir. Edward Kahn - US

3. The Boxer's Omen (1983) Dir. Kuei Chih-Hung - Hong Kong

2. The Cottage (2008) Dir. Paul Andrew Williams - UK

1. In A Lonely Place (1950) Dir. Nicholas Ray - US

Theatrical Releases:
4. Year One (2009) Dir. Harold Ramis - US 4/10
3. The Country Teacher (2008) Dir. Bohdan Slama - Czech Republic 8/10
2. My Sister's Keeper (2009) Dir. Nick Cassavetes - US 9/10
1. The Stoning of Soraya M. (2008) Dir. Cyrus Nowrasteh - US 10/10

And there it is, a second week in a row without a miserable piece of cinema. However, two particular films came close. Robert Siodmak, perhaps best known for his enduring film noir works such as Criss Cross (1949) or The Killers (1946) helmed a little turkey in the Dracula series, Son of Dracula (1943), starring a chubby Lon Chaney, Jr. as the evil vampiric spawn, who is nowhere near as interesting or intriguing as Gloria Holden in Dracula's Daughter (1936). Claiming Hungary is all "dried up," Count Alucard (which is Dracula spelled backwards, a "twist" literally spelled out for as often as it's pointed out that Dracula is a vampire) woos a young aristocratic woman in the US and marries her. Though it's rather unclear why exactly he has to marry her, (as master of the house seems a bit of a flimsy excuse), the film is a bit predictable and altogether unenthralling. Worst of all are the little old men pursuing the evil vampire, especially actor Frank Craven as the doctor. Some of the atmospheric effects save the film from utter disaster, whereas moments where the doctor paints the mark of the cross over vampire bites on small child's neck to cure him are a bit catastrophically asinine.

As for an oft forgotten subgenre of horror, the 1986 film Link provided me with my weekly fix of primate horror. While certainly not a good film, it has several moments of absolute hilarity that could have made this a favorite piece of camp cinema, except that it gets real dull right away. Terence Stamp stars as an animal researcher whom Elisabeth Shue assists for a summer job type of situation. Stamp happens to be a professor of anthropology (or something like that) and Shue, as a supposed bright young woman, sells him on hiring her claiming she can cook and clean, as being female, she has a "genetic aptitude." Stamp, looking like Bonnie Tyler singing "Total Eclipse of the Heart" in that ne plus ultra of bizarre music videos, keeps three primates at his seaside mansion with which Shue has to help him conduct vague experiments/research upon. The household is virtually run by Link, an orangutan that used to be a circus performer. Link likes to dress up as a butler, and he seems like a friendly enough little fella until we learn that Stamp is selling an insane chimp, Voodoo, to a vivisectionist and wants to have Link disposed of as well. Yes, Link goes a little ape shit, as only primates can quite manage to do. The most memorable scene of the film (besides opening with the scene where Marlene Dietrich performs "Hot Voodoo" in a gorilla costume in Blonde Venus) is a bathtub scene with Shue in which Link coerces his way into the bathroom and obviously ogles Shue's nubile young frame, and is also the only scene where the primate is not wearing his shirt. If that's not monkey horror, I don't know what is. (Though my personal favorite is Monkey Shines - 1988). A contender for the best picture directed by Richard Franklin (who is perhaps best known for his better-than-you'd expect Psycho II - 1983, starring Michael Jackson, errr, I mean Meg Tilly).

A champion of cinema the world over, a neglected genre for me is the martial arts film. Though The Boxer's Omen isn't quite a martial arts film, it was distributed by the Shaw Brothers Studio, which specialized in Hong Kong/martial arts films. The Boxer's Omen is more of a bizarre horror film involving an injured boxer asking his brother to go on a quest to lift a curse affecting his family---or something like that. The film is a bit all over the place and in between characters chopping off animal parts and eating them, spitting them up and feeding them to others, along with a plethora of other disgusting goop and fluid scenes, the plot gets a little lost. But I will say it is one of the most bizarre films I've seen recently that somehow manages to keep your interest, if in a vague sort of way. As many have pointed out, the film is also gorgeous to look at when you're not bombarded with intestines and maggots. And I now know that it is my destiny to discover other works by director Kuei Chih-hung. The Boxer's Omen was his last film.

The director of the bizarre black comedy/horror hybrid, The Cottage, Paul Andrew Williams, also happened to pen the deliciously morbid The Children (2008). The Cottage stars Andy Serkis (Gollum from The Lord of the Rings) and Reece Shearsmith (Shaun of the Dead - 2004) as two polar opposite siblings that kidnap the daughter of Serkis' gangster employer. Jennifer Ellison (The Phantom of the Opera - 2004) stars as the foul mouthed daughter, resembling the evil bitch twin of Emma Bunton. Ellison steals the film, which plays like a black comedy gangster film until 3/4 of the way into the film it becomes The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. The gear change is intriguing and abrupt, making the film lose a little steam but creating a lasting impression nonetheless as the four individuals now involved flee from a monstrous being that could be Leatherface's brother.

Landing in the top spot of this week's DVD selections is Nicholas Ray's excellent study of loneliness masquerading as film noir with In A Lonely Place (1950). Starring Humphrey Bogart as Dixon Steele, a bitter Hollywood screenwriter suddenly finding himself suspected of murdering a young woman he had invited to his home and Gloria Grahame as his neighbor that provides his alibi and falls in love with him, In A Lonely Place was meant to be, as Ray points out, a film about the "violence in all of us." As the murder investigation continues, Bogart's character becomes more and more violent, to the extent that he frightens Grahame, who has now becomes his fiancee. Grahame was never better (and actually looking quite a bit like Scarlett Johansson) as she is here. It was during the filming of this picture that Nicholas Ray and Grahame ended their marriage (she would go on to marry one of his sons from a previous marriage---woa!) but both kept it a secret so they wouldn't be replaced during filming. The film's everlasting lines "I was born when she kissed me, I died when she left me, I lived a few weeks while she loved me," should affect those of us plagued by a romantic disposition. Excellent stuff. Ray will perhaps be best known as the director of Rebel Without A Cause (1955), but I rank this film, as well as Johnny Guitar (1954) as far superior.